By Mikelann Valterra

When women are in a money fog, their dream machine shuts down.

What is money fog? It is the feelings of stress and anxiety caused by financial vagueness. We lose our vision and the dreams for our life because the money fog literally obstructs our view of the future.

When women feel stressed and stuck around money, it keeps them from stepping into the life they want.

They feel stuck in their lives in general, just trying to get through the here and now. Sometimes they have glimpses of dreams, hobbies, houses, or different careers, but the money fog blocks their dream machine. The dream machine begins to spin up, and then money rears its scary, foggy head, and the dream machine shuts down, replaced with stress. “I could never afford it”. “I doubt I make enough for that.” “I could never do that”. However, the money fog keeps you from really finding out.

Money fog keeps you from answering questions related to dreaming and possibilities for the future, from

“I wonder if I could consider…?” to “Would it be possible to…”?

And even bigger inquiries, such as

“What do I really want to consider doing with my life?”

When we are in a money fog, we simply can’t answer these questions, so we shut down the internal conversation.

Being clear about your money life, learning to be in control of the flow of money into and out of your life, leads to exploring a life of your dreams. But how can this clarity open you up to possibility?

Let’s turn to a gardening metaphor to explore the answer.

By creating and tilling healthy financial soil, your dreams can take root.  This rich moist soil is made up of knowing where your money goes, of having little debt and possessing sufficient savings. It’s made up of knowing how to plan for expenses, both big and small, and knowing how to adjust when things don’t go according to plan. It’s about feeling in control. The money fog, with its related fear, anxiety, and scattering of life and financial resources, causes the soil to dry out. Dreams simply can’t take root under those circumstances.

The seeds of possibility are all around us:

Many opportunities come to us in our lives, from travel and hobbies to dreams of higher education and having children. But an unhealthy, chaotic, and foggy money life makes the seeds skip off the arid ground and blow away. They have no chance to take hold.

Perhaps someone floats the idea of taking a long vacation and spending the summer in a country you’ve always been curious about. But your first reaction is “I could never afford that!”, though you don’t really know—and never investigate the possibility. Or you’re reading an article online about a really cool city, and you think for a moment what it would be like to move there, but you immediately assume it’s impossible. Who knows what you would need to earn to do that? You shut the idea down. Maybe you meet an interesting woman who is super involved in horseback riding, something you’ve always fantasized about. But your work schedule has never allowed you to do anything that took so much time. And the expense! You make great money, and you work really hard for it. So, you just keep plugging along and dismiss the idea of ever riding horses.

However, when seeds land in healthy financial soil devoid of money fog, you can till and care for them in the garden of your life. Some of the seedlings you discover in your soil you nurture and let grow—tiny ideas that become real possibilities because you have the financial clarity and confidence to explore bringing them to fruition.

In my own life, one tiny seed that blew in on the wind was the idea of learning how to dance tango. At first, I brushed the idea off, simply saying I was too busy. But I also initially assumed that the expense of lessons, fancy clothes, and my secret dreams of dance-related travel would likely be too expensive. Then, I paused and turned to my spending plan, which serves to keep me out of the money fog, and began playing with the idea of taking up the hobby. I took a clear look at all the potential costs. Could I start with some dance lessons to even see if I liked it as much as I suspected? Why, yes, I could.

One thing led to another, and I fell in love with tango with an all-encompassing passion that has given me more joy than I could have imagined. If I had been under financial stress or scattered about money, I likely would not have dipped my toe into the wondrous, complex world of tango dancing. My financial clarity allowed me to see what I could afford and possible tradeoffs to make if I wanted to spend more than I originally anticipated. For example, one year I waited to do some landscaping so I could travel more for dance. Creativity and choice flourish when out of the money fog.

In contrast, arid money soil is made up of money vagueness and a general scattered sense of money.

It often reflects your own unique combination of debt, insufficient savings, and/or low net worth. Or you work too much for the money you make, and there is no extra time or energy for these dreams. Either way, it’s the vagueness that kills the dreams. You honestly don’t know if you can afford something that arises or how much you actually need to make whenever money fog obscures your vision.

If your financial soil is rocky and dry, all those seeds merely blow away. You don’t even notice them floating by, carried on the wind, beyond a vague feeling of a life not fully lived, hobbies not developed, places never visited.

Being clear with your money and developing a healthy relationship with it creates an alchemical soil in which possibilities can take root and flourish.

Learning how to be in control of money and becoming financially empowered are about learning to harness your life force, which can take you anywhere. And you’ll always feel there is a choice.

What seeds will YOU find growing in your healthy financial soil?

Look for them. Ask yourself, what would you explore if you felt totally in control of your finances?

This article is based on Mikelann Valterra‘s latest book, Rise Above the Money Fog—The key to confidence, clarity, and control over your life. The book explores the hidden impact of money fog in our lives through the stories of four women, the psychology of where money fog comes from, and what it takes to rise above it. To order, see www.riseabovethemoneyfog.com

Great news! My new book Rise Above the Money Fog, the key to confidence, clarity, and control over your life, launched this week on Amazon. I am happy to say it earned the top new release in both Amazon’s finance category AND women and business! Wow. I am over the moon. I want to thank everyone who has purchased a copy and a special thank you to the readers who shared their reviews on Amazon. It feels so good to see this book in the world, after a lot of hard work. At only 100 pages, it is short but powerful. May it help women rise above the money fog and step into their true potential!

Book info and ordering

At fifty-one, Christine was tired of being stressed about money.

She had worked as a corporate coach since her early thirties. Now, it was coming on almost two decades that she had worked with large companies on organizational change. She was very good at her job and generally felt she was well paid. Her income had grown over the years. But at night when sleep refused to come, she’d worry about the future. Would she always have to work so many hours? Would she be able to pull back and enjoy her garden more? Images of her old, faded couch came to mind. She loved being at home, her sweet nest, but the couch she really wanted cost thousands. And her son was asking for ski lessons, another big expense. She kept avoiding talking about it with him.  And how about a real vacation?…

She felt fear over the future, overwhelm about figuring out how to afford her increasingly expensive life, and guilt over not giving her son what she thought could be a healthy activity for him. Income, outgo—how to get it all to work? Her mind whirling, sleep did not come.

Fear, Overwhelm, Guilt. F.O.G.

Christine was suffering from money fog.

What is money fog? At its simplest, it’s the feelings of stress and anxiety caused by financial vagueness.

More specifically, it’s when we feel fear, overwhelm, and/or guilt (F.O.G.) as a result of being out of touch with the money in our life—in other words, not being clear, confident, and in control of the money coming in and going out.

Said another way, the money fog is the feelings caused by being financially hazy.

Are you in a money fog? Let’s find out.

Here are ten questions to help you discern if you are in a money fog. Circle yes or no:

1. Do you ever feel frustrated and wonder, “Where did it all go?” YES or NO
2. Do you feel fear or anxiety when you think of your money? YES or NO
3. Do you ever feel guilty when you reflect on something you bought? YES or NO
4. Do you know where all your money really goes? For example, do you know what you spend on clothes, eating out, and vacations? Do you know what your home really costs you? YES or NO
5. Do you have a system for tracking what you spend? YES or NO
6. Do you know how much money you need each month to live comfortably and avoid consumer debt? YES or NO
7. Do you know how much money you need to earn annually to cover the entire year in a satisfying way, including retirement savings? YES or NO
8. Do you know your net worth? YES or NO
9. Do you feel in control of your personal finances? YES or NO
10. Does money feel like a sacred tool to help you create your best life? YES or NO

Count the number of “yes” answers for questions 1–3.  Answer _____

Count the number of “no” answers for questions 4-10. Answer _____

Add the numbers. If your score is more than 4, you are likely suffering from some level of money fog.

While I hope you’re happy with your score, chances are you identify with some level of money fog. The dilemma with money fog is that people can often only identify it by the hidden impact it has on their life.

When we are in a fog, we are not fully aware of it. We sense things are dim. And we will drive slowly if we are in a fog, trying to avoid hitting something, barely able to see the road ahead of us. We do not excitedly plan the adventures ahead of us if we are driving in a fog. Rather, it takes all our internal resources merely to cling to the road and try to keep safe. But it’s not until we drive out of the fog that we become aware of just how thick it is.

Money fog is essentially a cloud sitting on the ground of our lives—a murky condition that reduces visibility. When we’re unclear about what we can afford or how much we really need to earn, this fog causes confusion, frustration, and bewilderment.  Money fog also keeps us from seeing what might be possible further down the road.

Think about it like flow.

The money fog arises when you aren’t in touch with the FLOW of money. This flow is like a tide coming in and going out. Income comes in: earned income, rental income, child support, trust income, dividend income, and so on. Expenses go out. Oh the outgo of expenses! From monthly expenses like groceries and utility bills to the never-ending pop of “periodic expenses” such as airplane tickets, car repairs, and home remodels. Are you clear about this flow? Are you in charge of it, or is it just happening? Are you confident in how you handle this flow? Do you feel in control of your money and your life? Or are you sometimes overwhelmed by the flow?

Money as a sacred resource

As a rule, women don’t really care about money for the sake of money. It’s not a game in which we enjoy keeping score and stockpiling money for the sake of looking at it. Rather, it’s about what we can do with this resource. Yes, money is a sacred resource, and yes, it is energy and power. It is a potent energy with the power to give you what you truly desire in life. However, it is not about the money but rather what you can do with it. Money can help us live our dreams, deeply enjoy our life, take care of our children, secure our future, and donate to causes that touch our heart. This is the power of money. And money fog blocks this power.

You want to use this power to live your best life. When you feel stressed and depleted, which the money fog causes, it’s harder to attend to deeper matters like your spiritual growth. When you’re trying to relax into meditation after your yoga practice and you find yourself “running numbers” in your head or making a mental note to transfer money between accounts, these thoughts and worries are not very conducive to higher states.

When you feel financially constricted, overwhelmed, or stressed, these feelings can affect you emotionally and spiritually, robbing you of energy. The money fog also stifles inspiration. When money causes stress or simply takes up a lot of headspace, your creativity can become blocked. It is more difficult to write, paint, dance, and express yourself in the world when you are engulfed in the money fog.

But it does not have to be this way. Naming a problem goes a long way towards solving it. Once you realize you are in a money fog, you can begin to rise above it.

We all deserve to step into living fuller lives—filled with meaning, joy, and purpose. Once out of the fog, people can more easily step into new chapters, explore their own purpose, and entertain new adventures and possibilities in their lives. Without the money fog clinging to us and obscuring our vision, we can finally see new paths before us.

~~~

This article is based on Mikelann Valterra‘s latest book, Rise Above the Money Fog—The key to confidence, clarity, and control over your life. The book explores the hidden impact of money fog in our lives through the stories of four women, the psychology of where money fog comes from, and what it takes to rise above it. To order, see www.riseabovethemoneyfog.com

It’s not your imagination—most of us grew up hearing very little about money. The result of this childhood omission is… the money fog.

Written for women, author Mikelann Valterra explores the far-reaching hidden impact of money fog through the stories of four women, dives into the origins of the money fog, and then shares what it takes to rise above it.

From inside Rise Above the Money Fog—

“When you are inside the money fog, you can barely sense it. Your vision is obstructed. It seems as though it should be so obvious—something that completely envelops you. But it isn’t. From the inside, it is nearly invisible, although it impacts you in ways you can’t see. But once out of it, the clarity is beautiful, and life’s possibilities emerge before you—possibilities you could barely glimpse from inside the fog.”

Praise from other authors and readers:

“Mikelann is one of the most effective money coaches I know. Her wisdom shines through every page.” —Barbara Stanny Huson, author of Secrets of Six Figure Women

“Rise Above the Money Fog is a testament to Mikelann’s years of expertise and her deep understanding of the emotional complexities that often surround our financial lives. This book isn’t just another guide—it’s a transformative approach to understanding your relationship with money.” —Karen McCall, Founder of MoneyGrit., and the author of Financial Recovery: Developing a Healthy Relationship with Money

“Rise Above the Money Fog reveals the ways in which even highly successful women can struggle to live the lives they actually want.”  —Madeleine Butler, Executive Coach

“Mikelann’s empowering questions, personal stories, and inspiring examples will support you to begin using money as the sacred tool that it is to create and live your best life.” —Dana Conley, MA, Life Transformation Coach and Certified Financial Recovery™ Counselor

From the back cover:

For twenty-five years, money coach Mikelann Valterra has worked with amazing women all over the world. Her driving mission: to help them rise above the money fog. Now, in this small gem of a book, Mikelann reveals what the money fog is, its far-reaching impact on your life, its hidden origins, and the remarkable possibilities that await you on the other side. Full of stories about relatable women, you’ll be surprised and excited by what you encounter in these pages.

• Learn the three core questions you must answer to improve your money life.
• Identify your childhood money pattern.
• Discover the two fears that may be blocking your way out of the money fog.
• Explore what big thing YOU would do if money didn’t stop you.

Book Information:

Author: Mikelann Valterra

Print Length: 112 pages

Publication: October 3, 2023

Publisher: Citrine Life Press

Formats: Paperback and Digital (Kindle and PDF)

To order book/ more information: See www.riseabovethemoneyfog.com  Available in digital or paperback versions. This book is also available on Amazon.

Contact author for interviews, speaking, workshops, and quotes: mikelann@seattlemoneycoach.com  206-634-0861, Pacific Time Zone

Professional website: www.seattlemoneycoach.com

About Mikelann Valterra, MA, AFC®

For more than two decades, master money coach Mikelann Valterra, MA, AFC®, has helped women transform their relationship to money. A highly respected expert in financial psychology, she has written and spoken extensively on powerful, practical ways to reduce money anxiety as well as effective methods for earning, saving, reducing debt, and managing money. Mikelann has been quoted in national publications, including Forbes, USA Today, and Business Insider. She also guests on podcasts all over the world.  When not writing and speaking, she teaches clients how to rise above the money fog and craft their ideal life—letting go of financial stress forever. When not working, you can find Mikelann on the dance floor indulging her love of Argentine tango.  See www.seattlemoneycoach.com Mikelann’s clients span the globe.