I’ve always thought of myself as a reasonably patient person. And this patience is a handy thing, when it comes to spending. I can often make myself wait until something goes on sale. I’ve noticed my son is less so, and hope that he will “mature” as time goes on. But now I wonder if I’m giving myself too much credit, and that maybe I am, in part, to blame for his impatience. Why? Because I grew up with a last name that started with “B”. (Barton, if you’re curious.) And I had the audacity to change my last name to Valterra and then saddle my son with it—at the very rear of the alphabet.
According to a new study recently released, dubbed “The Last Name Effect”, if your childhood last name was towards the end of the alphabet, you were usually at the end of the line- the last in line at the cafeteria, the last to get the teachers attention and so on. Therefore, this created frustration and impatience. By the time you got to the front of the line, what you waited for may have been gone. Now, as an adult, you buy what you want as soon as you see it. You worry that what you want will be taken—better get there early. (God forbid it disappear while you are forced to wait!)
“For years, simply because of your name, you’ve received inequitable treatment,” says Kurt Carlson, an assistant professor at Georgetown’s McDonough School of Business and a co-author of the paper, which is to be published in the Journal of Consumer Research. “So when you get to exercise control, you seize on opportunity. It’s a coping strategy, and over time it becomes a natural way to respond.”
Conversely, the theory is that those who grow up with a last name towards the front of the alphabet have more patience when it comes to spending. We’re more confident that if the first deal doesn’t work out, no worries—there will be another deal.
Hmmm. Well, as I said, my son is at the very end of the alphabet. In fact, his first name starts with Z, so there’s no way that my son is not at the end. I hadn’t thought a lot about this. Then two weeks ago he stormed into the house after school. I asked him if he handed in his science paper we worked so hard on. “If you hadn’t given me a stupid last name at the end of the alphabet I would have!!!” He was practically yelling. “But the teacher didn’t even get to me today. Now I have to wait until tomorrow!!!” And he stomped off. At the time I chalked this up to his brewing puberty.
But after I read about this study, I now wonder. Does giving my child a last name at the end of the alphabet mean I’m going to raise someone more prone to spending—someone who fears as an adult that he’d better jump on a good deal quick, lest it be gone if he waits? Does always being at the end of the alphabet mean that eventually, with years of having to wait, wait, wait, a person will be so pent-up that they will not be able to master the art of delayed gratification, once it truly matters as an adult?
What is your opinion? Yes, OF COURSE what makes us prone to spend is far more complicated than this. Our spending behavior is the result of our upbringing, our brain chemistry and our current life situation. But do you think your childhood last name impacted you? Do tell! I’m curious.
Mine starts with “P,” and I’m very patient when it comes to spending, and in fact, I tend to be a saver rather than a spender.
However, in other areas my life I am very inpatient, but I have never, and do not now, chalk this up to having a last name starting with “P.”
Mikelann, This is a fascinating study, and as a “S” I relate. Think there could be a parallel study on height, as I was always very tall and while growing up all lines were in ‘size order.’ So in effect I had a bit of a double-whammy! 😉
Mikelann, I’m a G last name but I agree with Lora. I was the tallest by far, of the girls and the boys and always in the back. I was the last and often mistaken as older bc of being taller, often told to wait and let the other younger children go first. Today I sing in a choir…and again I’m in the back. Can’t see anything over the 5″5 ers with their 3 inch heals! Lol. Today I call myself the back row diva and it has enabled me to create stronger relationships with those around me bc we need to rely on each other to figure out what’s going on!
Mikelann,
It certainly is something worthy of thought. My maiden name before I married started with a K so it falls somewhere in the middle of the scale. Where do the middle people fit with this study? I am not necessarily impulsive in my buying habits nor am I patient enough to wait for a better offer. I guess I should be feel blessed that I am somewhere in the middle. I am less prone to get into trouble when managing my finances!:)
Very interesting study and concept… Hadn’t really thought of the impact of always being last in line… but it makes sense.
As a “T” I do remember being near the end of a lot of lines. But, somehow I managed to hold on to my “saving” power. I guess if I had to wait for it – or it was gone when I got there – I’d convince myself I didn’t need it in the first place. And, I must have been right at least most of the time.
On the other hand, I was a bright student, so I often was pushed forward into things, regardless of name or lines…
My spouse is a “C”… and he is much more free with his money – more of an ‘enjoy it while you can’ attitutude, which I’ve come to appreciate (in moderation, of course).
I definitely think getting a last name with a letter from the latter part of the alphabet is a bum wrap. I do feel the compulsion to impulse buy, but thankfully, I generally resist it.
I do jump on other things however, and compel my relatively laid back husband to do the same (i.e. get to the front of the line when boarding an airplane so our carry on luggage will fit into the overhead compartment). Interestingly, his last name begins with “T” (much to my sadness now that I see the life of doom I’ve signed on for for my progeny and myself).
I think in my case, having this name has made me more alert and in my husband’s case, it made him more patient. Or perhaps it simply crushed his spirit, depending on how you look at it.
We are also tall people and will generally stand behind other (tiny) folks so they can show up in group photos or so they can see if we’re all watching a street performer, etc. We don’t want to deny anyone the simple joys of life we’ve hate to wait longer to experience.
In conclusion, I think I might consider giving our child some completely different last name from ours like hippy people do. Perhaps “Earthlove” would be a good last name or “Flower.” I’m open to suggestions. We can let people think it’s because we’re environmentalists and not reveal we’re the victims of last name chauvinism.
Or perhaps we shouldn’t be greedy and just aim for a name in the middle of the alphabet like that lady in the last post. She seems like she’s awfully well-adjusted…
I think this is totally an issue that affects us as adults. It makes a lot of sense to me. I always thought that my lassez-faire attitude towards opportunities came from being raised in the midst of my grandparents’ upper-class attitude, even though it only was part of my world from age 6 through 9.
But now I really wonder, did having the last name “Carroll” help me feel like I’d usually get what I wanted, feel taken care of, and not have to worry about getting my turn.
I’d say yes, it did. Because I don’t ever feel that concerned about getting my share as an adult now. I don’t stress about missed opportunities because I feel another will totally come along (or I think of it in the spiritual sense of “it wasn’t meant to be for some unknowable, but good, reason” — an easy belief to hold when you feel certain more good things will come soon).
As someone who believes in attitude affecting outcome, I am so grateful to be able to feel this way. But I see how much that sucks for the latter half of the alphabet!
I’ll inquire more with my spouse, since he’s the one who grew up “Whalley” and see if it resonates for him.
I agree -you’ll notice I couldn’t bear to part with being first on the roll call when I got married. In fact I remember grieving at having to leave being ‘first book off the reserved shelf at the library.’ I am not that comfortable having a hyphenated name but I like having the A position. And yes, I am a real wait for the next opportunity person.
Now I know why I cannot bear to wait in a queue -I will go and do another errand rather than wait in a queue -now I am realising I actually feel others have taken my spot. In school, I was always among the first two or three names to be called out. I will never call my self impatient again!
Hi Mikelann~
Interesting thought, here’s something to consider. My maiden name was Adams, as a result I was almost always first (and was first born),
so I rarely had to wait for much in school, etc. Being patient wasn’t something I had to “learn” as a result of having to wait for lots of other kids ahead of me. My guess is that the folks in the middle of the alphabet had more of an opportunity to learn and practice patience. They knew they weren’t first, that they would most likely get a turn soon, and that they definitely weren’t last–so no need to worry about “not enough”. Perhaps the first part of the alphabet, and the end of the alphabet have the same issue with delayed gratification–but for different reasons!
Thanks Mikelann (pretty name). I just came across your blog. This is a fun and interesting theory in the tradition of ‘birth order’. I grew up a ‘W’ and was always last or close to last but I turned out a bit different…I did feel deprived but instead of using retail therapy I held back – a lot. Too much, even when I needed something, not just wanting it.