Remember that “underearning” is the pattern of earning below YOUR potential. It’s about underselling yourself, even though you don’t want to. But you can’t overcome this pattern if you don’t see it. You must identify your pattern- your behaviors– in the first place. Women tend to see each situation in isolation—it is time to connect the dots.
I want you to take a step back and look back through your career. Look at the last 10 or 20 years. Do you see a pattern of earning less money than you need? If you have made “enough” money, do you think you’ve been earning at your true potential? Have you been thriving?
Here are 7 common ways that self-employed women undersell themselves. Do you identify with any of these? Remember, you have to identify your pattern before you can step into great prosperity.
7 Common symptoms of underearning
- You set your original fees too low (lower than a man would have!)—often because you felt you were too new or inexperienced…
- You struggle telling your clients you are going to raise your fees (you fear you’ll lose your clients or you worry they will feel that you think money is more important than people.)
- When you do raise your fees, you don’t raise them by enough money, and hence always feel behind.
- You did not negotiate your commission structure/ contract —or didn’t push it as much as a man would have
- You discount your services in a variety of ways and often times don’t bill for all of your time
- You often give a lot away for free—free advice, free consultations, free help
- While working hard, you don’t market yourself enough. You don’t spend enough time making sure you are highly visible
Do any of these ring a bell?
As you can see, there are countless ways that women “underearn” though often times it is about what they don’t do. Did you notice that a lot of underearning is passive, as opposed to active? We just never say anything….
Women work hard and value their relationships with their colleagues and their clients. Underearning can slip in, silently, by simply not doing what needs to be done. You don’t have the negotiation conversation, or the fee conversation. You just don’t ask for what you need and want. Hence, a lot of underearning quietly saps your energy and strength over time.
Take heart! It is possible to earn more.
But step number one to conquering underearning is naming it. (In order to break a pattern you must identify the pattern.) Yes, it can be overwhelming to get in touch with this. Grief commonly comes up. And we can get mad at ourselves when we look at this. But please know that you are not alone. This is a very common, though often hidden, phenomena. It’s time to break the isolation around this issue. You are an amazing woman doing great work, and I believe it is possible to make more money.
Be gentle with yourself as you continue to look at this. Trust that this is the perfect time to address this issue. How wonderful to look at this now and not in another five or ten years. Earning your worth is a process. Give yourself credit for stepping into this process.
Start talking about underearning with your women friends and colleagues. Do they undersell themselves? (Somehow it is easier to see in other people! We just tend to stew in our own growing resentment.) Start writing about this. Keep reading about this.
Be willing to be uncomfortable. Author Barbara Stanny wrote that the number one prerequisite to making more money is the willingness to be uncomfortable. I agree with her. If you wait until you are perfectly comfortable telling people what you charge, for example, you will wait too long. Be willing to stretch. It gets easier. And then you move to the next level.
For now, start noticing your own pattern.
Ready to earn more and step into greater freedom? Click here to be notified of the next time Mikelann offers her 8 week Unlock Your Earning Power course.
Mikelann, I wish you could see my head nodding vigorously. I have had times in my former corporate career, and as a business owner where I admit to having slipped into a combination of these. While men have emotional ties to money too, it doesn’t seem to come out in the losing way that we do to ourselves. This is a great reminder for all of us to be watchful. When I teach business owners and aspiring entrepreneurs how to set up, manage and market themselves, I touch on some of this, but will have to start pointing people in your direction. This is highly valuable! Thanks.
This is a powerful article. Many moons ago I would reduce my fees, give my services for free and 9 times out of ten, it was not appreciated and did not produce lasting results for the client. I would mumble my fees, or I was hesitant. Now, I boldly tell my prospective clients my fees and I will not see anyone unless there is a commitment for several sessions.
Changing your thoughts to change your life for most of the population, will not happen in one session. I will not allow someone to become my client unless they commit to and pay for several sessions up front.
I am still trying to come to terms with number 6. At times I will freely give my time – advising, mentoring, coaching someone, under the guise of paying it forward. I am really weak with this one.
Number 7 – I am taking giant strides in the right direction.
Your article is enlightening and I see many women around me who fall into one or more of these seven categories. I will link this to a future posting on my blog.
A quick tip: As a web developer, I’ve had many clients dangle a “phase II” or “a lot more projects” or “a much bigger project when we raise more money.” DON’T FALL FOR THE TRICK. Demand your full payment from the get go, or don’t do it. All too often that phase II or next project doesn’t exist, or won’t exist for years to come. It’s a ploy clients will use to get your work for less $, and it’s lame.
This is great advice! I’m starting my business and had to come to terms with the fact that I really need to stand up for myself and do right by myself.
It was really hard at first, especially with pricing and promotion. The little voice said “you’re being greedy, you’re being pushy”. Then I realized I needed to charge reasonable prices because if I’m going to give my things away, what’s the point of having this business? I made myself do realistic pricing and lots of promotion and it’s gotten easier and easier the more I do it.
Took me time to read all the comments, but I truly enjoyed the post. It proved to be Really helpful to me and I’m sure to all the commenters right here! It is usually nice whenever you can not only be informed, but also entertained! I’m sure you had fun writing this article.